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You Never Can Tell

Originally published at Misangela.com. Please leave any comments there.



Watched Pulp Fiction the other night. Still LOVE it.

Been a bit in the dumps lately. The pub thing is stalled and it’s frustrating. The world is ruled by the mighty dollar. It chaps my ass that people in PRISON have more shit handed to them (free plastic surgery? Sure!) than hardworking people do. Ugh.

Still haven’t spoken to my asshole family. Sent the women a Mother’s Day treat, got no thank you, nothing. Fuck those people. I also got rid of the idiot niece from my FL on FB. She is only on there to spy on me, no doubt, and she thinks I’m spying on her, since she keeps all her posts private. So, fuck her. I’m so done with them. I suppose the next call I get will be when one of the parents dies. Fine.

A little more info regarding my vaguebooking earlier – and the title of this post! You never can tell what the Universe has in store for you! Nick has been given the opportunity to work with Joystick Game Bar. They are expanding into adjoining space (they are also building a beer garden across the street!) and they want to double their arcade. They were working with another arcade guy, but he simply could not get what they needed done in a timely fashion and he resigned today. Nick will be stepping into his slot as well as spearheading the expansion. It is exciting!

So what this means is that we are officially getting into the arcade game business. This is not the business we necessarily were wanting to get into, but we feel that working with the Joystick guys will benefit us in the long run. They are really great guys and I can’t wait to collaborate on the new arcade stuff as well as whatever comes up in the future. I think they are good entrepreneurs to hang with. I’ll be involved with this endeavor to help Nick with the admin stuff: procurement, billing, logistics, etc. It’s what I do.

We don’t know where this will lead, but we are taking the open door to find out.

When you’re in a closed room and the Universe gives you a door, you take it.

Let’s hope it will lead us to where we need to be. :)

PS: The Pub concept is not dead (or all dead, just mostly dead SEE CLIP), but it’s going nowhere without more cash. It’s back burner for now. Just a quick rework of the biz card and we’ll have Player One Arcade Services. ;)

Asian BBQ Pork Ribs

Originally published at Misangela.com. Please leave any comments there.

I’ve tested this recipe several times and it’s solid! It’s good in the slow cooker or in the oven – but the oven gives you a lovely brown crust that I really enjoy. Pork shoulder chops or ribs or pork loin ribs (country style ribs) are spectacular with this sauce. I serve over grits or polenta. TO. DIE. FOR.

Asian BBQ Pork Ribs
2# Pork loin or shoulder ribs (often labeled “country style”)

Sauce:
1/2 c soy sauce
1 Tbl minced garlic or garlic paste (I prefer paste. Get it at the Indian or Asian store.)
2 Tbl brown sugar
1 Tbl rice wine vinegar
1 Tbl sambal chile garlic sauce
1 tsp ginger paste (Again, from the Indian/Asian store.)
2 tsp sesame oil
1/2 tsp black pepper
1 Tbl cornstarch
sesame seeds
1 cup grits cooked in 1.5 cup water, 3 tbl butter and 1/2 cup heavy cream.

Preheat oven to 300-325F. Mix up the sauce and pour about half over the ribs. Make sure the ribs are well coated. Place ribs in single layer in a oven safe dish sprayed with PAM. Pour the rest of the sauce over the ribs and cover the tops of the ribs with sesame seeds. Cover tightly with foil and cook for about an hour and a half. At the 1.5 hr point, uncover the ribs and turn up the heat to 350F. Cook another hour or so until the ribs are nicely browned and the sauce is reduced. Pull the ribs from the oven, tent with foil and prepare the grits (or polenta if you prefer). Serve the ribs over the grits with some of the pan drippings. OMG so good!

Combing through the Archives

Originally published at Misangela.com. Please leave any comments there.

I am in the process of reading every single post I’ve done since this blog’s inception in 1999. That’s a LOT of posts, folks!

Mainly I’m doing it to clean up any typos, grammar mistakes, etc., but I’m also doing it to clean out posts that are irrelevant and check all the links to see if they are good. I’ve got a link checker, but it sucks.

This chore has needed to be done for a long time, so why not now? After the archives are all cleaned up, I think I’ll do a redesign. I really like a clean, readable layout, but I also like to display my photos, so I’m going to fiddle with that. I’m a three column girl, I admit, so I may just fiddle with the header and some of the colours. Dunno yet.

I think the trouble I’m having with my hands is carpal tunnel. I type A LOT and I think it’s finally caught up with me. Ugh. Nothing to be done about it, really. Take NSAIDs. Think I’ll try using this flat keyboard with a wrist support again.

Anyhoo, that’s all for today. I’ve got editing to do! :)

It’s referral time!

Originally published at Misangela.com. Please leave any comments there.

Noticed a big spike in my page views yesterday, so I naturally went to investigate. I went back 100 pings, which goes back a few days. Here are some highlights:

– Got several views from Daniel Davis’ FB post. ? No idea why.
– Got 40 views from the State of Alabama Information Services department in Montgomery, AL. HI LISSA!! Email me, Auntie Social!
– Hello Looney Tunes fan in Pepperell, Massachusetts!
– Hello Beijing, China!
– Hello AGAIN, Beijing, China! Nín h?o! ???
– Hello, Cincinnati, OH! Yep, Chantal customer service does indeed suck.
– Hello, older Mac user who shields the IP! Hope you enjoyed my artwork!
– I saw this in a search ping: Angela Kell date sites OK. ?
– Hi, Morrisville, Vermont! Hope you liked my haiku!
– Hi, Heather! Cox.net in Vegas!
– Hello Cedar Rapids, Iowa! I’ll bet you’re the one who emailed me about hair colour! Hope you got it sorted!
– And of course the myriad bots!

Cheers, y’all!

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It’s referral time!

Originally published at Misangela.com. Please leave any comments there.

Noticed a big spike in my page views yesterday, so I naturally went to investigate. I went back 100 pings, which goes back a few days. Here are some highlights:

– Got several views from Daniel Davis’ FB post. ? No idea why.
– Got 40 views from the State of Alabama Information Services department in Montgomery, AL. HI LISSA!! Email me, Auntie Social!
– Hello Looney Tunes fan in Pepperell, Massachusetts!
– Hello Beijing, China!
– Hello AGAIN, Beijing, China! ???
– Hello, Cincinnati, OH! Yep, Chantal customer service does indeed suck.
– Hello, older Mac user who shields the IP! Hope you enjoyed my artwork!
– I saw this in a search ping: Angela Kell date sites OK. ?
– Hi, Morrisville, Vermont! Hope you liked my haiku!
– Hi, Heather! Cox.net in Vegas!
– Hello Cedar Rapids, Iowa! I’ll bet you’re the one who emailed me about hair colour! Hope you got it sorted!
– And of course the myriad bots!

Cheers, y’all!

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Trigger Warning

Originally published at Misangela.com. Please leave any comments there.

It’s a trendy phrase and the title of Neil Gaiman’s new collection of short stories. It’s to warn people that their delicate sensibilities might be disturbed by what comes next. [Feel free to skip this entry. It’s just more family bullshit that I am trying to process and writing helps me do that.]

My family needs a trigger warning. Every time the phone rings and it’s my brother I immediately think “who’s dead?” or “what part of the new Mac I gave him is pissing him off now?” If it’s my niece, I assume similar things, but she’s generally quiet now that she has a sickly kid to deal with.

Anyway, my family is a big fat trigger for me. They cause me anxiety and stress me out like nothing else. I’ve tried just not talking to them, but they always end up calling me for something. This latest batch of ill will and name calling came from my brother, who has been calling me to bitch about the new Mac Mini we gave him to replace an old ass eMac that’s over a decade old. Sunday evening, he called to bitch.

“It’s different!” he cries. “This new Mac is a piece of shit” he declares. “The old one was much better” he asserts. To which I say, “YES it is different, NO it is not shit nor inferior, you are just illiterate and you are afraid of change.” He actually agreed with that. Yet, he calls to tell me what a piece of shit it is because “a little icon is missing and I need it to fill out forms”. Of course this is gibberish, so I ask him to explain further so I can determine what it is that he’s looking for. He rants some more and I finally get out of him that he somehow uses photoshop to fill out pdfs. ? I’m shocked he’d be able to figure that out, frankly. And I don’t even know if that’s really what he used or not.

We asked him many times what applications he used regularly. Browser, email, scanner, printer, the usual suspects. NOT ONE TIME did he mention Photoshop, so we did not install Photoshop on this new Mac because he’s so Mac illiterate that we never thought he’d use it.

I apologized for leaving Photoshop off (if that is even what he’s talking about) and he continued to whine and bitch. I snapped. I told him that what he should really be saying to me is THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME A NEW COMPUTER, rather than the constant bitching and whining. I said “You people never appreciate anything I do for you, EVER. All you do is bitch and complain and tell me what an asshole I am for doing things for you!” (Yes I call them YOU PEOPLE.) Then I proceeded to yell at him for being such a fucking asshole and being an unappreciative, self centered asshole at that. My rage button had been pushed, folks and I let him have it. He was yelling back – I’ve no idea what insults he was hurling. Then I hung up with one final “You’re such an ASSHOLE!”

I gathered myself and called him back. I told him to print the forms, fill them in and rescan them until we can do something about the software. He whined about that. I didn’t even bother to try to find out if it was actually READER that he’d been using. I said, “Well, that’s just how it is. Tell you what, I’ll bring that fucking eMac back up there, take back the Mini and you can NOT call me when the eMac dies, because it will. It is not a car, it is way past its lifespan and it could croak any second. Which is why I used MY MONEY to get you a new system that’s less than 12 years old.” He tried to backtrack and say thanks for the new computer, but I was way beyond that happy crappy at this point. I told him to SAVE IT, I know he doesn’t appreciate it at all.

That was all it took to get him started with his usual arsenal of resentment: the parents. It’s ALL MY FAULT that he is stuck there with them. He yells, “Well, if you had to do MY job – you’d NEVER be able to do what I do!” or something to that effect. Which has nothing whatsoever to do with the goddam Mac, but it’s his ultimate reason for calling me. He likes to take out his frustrations on me in an effort to guilt me or something. I was already pissed off, so I let him have it again. It devolved into a screaming match of me calling him a self centered asshole and him accusing me of causing everything that’s wrong with his life and being clueless in general. (They all think I’m the dumbest person on the planet and have told me so repeatedly.)

He likes to insinuate that it is my fault that he literally gave up his life to be at his mama’s beck and call and now he’s got to take care of two sickly old people (and a dumbass daughter who got knocked up and brought a baby into the mix).

That insinuation makes me apoplectic with rage and I blurted out “Well why don’t you sell all that shit up there, put them in a home and MOVE ON with your life?!”

Then he hung up. Of course he did.

I’m not just being mean with that statement. I used it in a mean way, yes, but that statement is truly what needs to happen. All that property, the house, barn and garage with equipment needs to be sold. First it needs to be signed over to my brother (it probably is already, they won’t give me anything when they die, I’m sure), then it needs to be sold. The cash needs to be split with the bulk put into a managed fund of some sort to earn a little interest and some working capital put into an account to pay for the parents’ to live in an assisted living facility. Not a home, but assisted living, with staff to keep them fed, on their meds and exercised. Neither of them gets proper nutrition, medical care or physical therapy. They are literally wasting away up there: my mother weighs about 85# and my 5’10” father weights about 110#. It is serious.

My brother does his best, but he can’t take proper care of them all day while he’s at his shitty county job. They don’t eat all day – and if they do, it’s junk. Both of my parents are underweight and look HORRIBLE. They need more care and my brother simply can’t do it. That is nothing to be ashamed of, either. He is but ONE person! But admitting that you need help is not in my brother’s wheelhouse. No, you just struggle along, wallowing in your misery no matter what. If he would get them handled and get out from under that fucking house and land, he could then build himself a house of his own design somewhere (he can do that!) and bring his dumbass daughter and granddaughter with him and attempt to have a life of his own. But that’s just crazy talk from me, the dumb one who just doesn’t understand. Right.

I’ve brought up getting a maid service because the place is filthy. Nope. I’ve brought up having a day nurse. Nope. They are fine! Just ask them! I asked my mother if she thought that relying on my brother for everything was fair to him and she said, “Well what else can we do?”. PLENTY. But that answer is actually saying: “SURE it’s fair!” They honestly do not see that they’ve ruined my brother’s life. My brother’s daughter is just as bad: having a fucking baby at 17 with nothing to offer it and adding THAT to my brother’s load of SHIT he has to deal with. Awesome.

My brother transfers his anger and resentment for THEM onto ME. I am always to blame and I’m always the asshole. No matter what I do to try to help, it’s never enough. My brother wants me to sacrifice my life like he has sacrificed his. I’ll never, EVER do that. Parents should never, EVER expect that from their children. That is flat out WRONG. My mother is probably the most selfish person I’ve ever met. She is the reason my brother’s life is ruined. And she is not one tiny bit sorry. Not one bit. Ditto for the niece. Selfish, selfish people, all of them.

I’ll tell you something else: if I did, in some alternate reality, move back up there, you can be damned sure I’d have all that shit IN HAND. I’d have power of attorney. Shit would be sold. Parents moved. Brother and niece shoved into the real world to live a real life. This situation would be handled and the trains would run the fuck on time. At least then they’d have a real reason to hate me rather than the bullshit they claim now. If there is one thing in this world I’m good at, it’s making shit happen.

Nick always tells me that he can’t believe I’ve turned out as well as I have. I guess I agree. It took decades to beat back the damage done to me by my family – my mother in particular. But, still I am not a nice person. I have evil thoughts. I wish my family would die in an explosion. That’s the damaged part of me, right there. I try to keep that part buried as deep as I can. I try very, very hard to help others and be a nicer person. Sometimes I succeed, sometimes not. Often my logic and desire to keep the trains on time interferes with the nice. I’m OK with that.

Now I’m rambling. Sorry. I’m sleep deprived. I just had to get that OUT. Done.

The Fallacy of Facebook

Originally published at Misangela.com. Please leave any comments there.

As everyone knows, I’ve been trying to restart Drink & Draw for the last several months. It’s been pretty much a fruitless effort. I knew starting up over the holidays was probably not the best time, but we decided to run with it anyway.

It’s been hard to find cosplayers that have not been spoiled by the previous Drink & Draw. Mellow Mushroom paid them $75 + full meal/drink comps, which is a bit much, in my opinion. I’ve run into many of the alumni from MM who won’t even talk to me unless I offer them the same deal. Well, guess what? NO. We are starting up, we don’t have that kind of budget. It’s been annoying for me and I would be lying if I didn’t say I have a list of all the cosplayers who’ve refused. I do. And they’ll never hear from me again. I’d also be lying if I said “sorry” for that. I’m not sorry! I don’t have time to deal with people who are not even trying to be supportive.

On the other hand, I’ve found some really awesome cosplayers who are more than happy to pose for a giftcard and tips. I’ve been picking up their tab, which is fine with me. I truly appreciate these fine people who understand what we’re trying to do and are willing to throw in some time for a giftcard. These are the people that I will contact again if The Imperial gig continues or when I open my own place. The lesson in this is BE SUPPORTIVE if you possibly can. It will go further than being all about the benjamins.

So, my original reason for this post is to debunk some Facebook (FB for short) bullshit for you. Especially if you have a business or group on FB and think that it’s helping you.

It is not.

I’ve been running FIVE FB pages for the last few years. Two are restaurants, two are our businesses and one is for the Drink & Draw group. I can tell you with certainty that these pages do absolutely nothing to promote anything. FB will tell you that “Likes” matter and content matters. It does not. People like things all day long without ever coming back to the page. FB will not show anyone your page unless you pay them. It is a fact.

I can also tell you that when you have a group page and then have events, it does not matter how many people say they are attending. Odds are that none of them will actually show up.

It’s the FB effect: like or say YES but then never think about it again.

The Drink & Draw page is the perfect example. I say we’re canceling and get a surge of Likes and people saying they will attend, but when the event happens, it’s the same FOUR people as always. FB is absolutely useless. FB will make you think you’re doing great, but when the rubber hits the road, it’s all as empty as a repost of a kitten video. I cross post to FB from the site(s), but that’s it. I don’t spend time posting to FB and I don’t advise clients to do that, either. It’s a waste of time.

As far as social media goes, Twitter is a far better use of your time. All my clients have twitter feeds (I run FIVE of those, as well!) that are automagically fed from wordpress. I also post things to the feeds periodically. Just crosspost from wordpress to cover your bases. Automation is your friend. :)

Don’t skip having a website! FB is NOT the same thing and it will NOT give you as much exposure as a simple website will. Trust me on this one. If you are a small business, you absolutely need a decent website. Don’t let the fallacy of Facebook fool you into thinking that it will do the job just as well as a real site for the low low cost of FREE. You get what you pay for and FB proves that. Buy your domain and get a site set up. Use wordpress.com – it’s free and it’s easy to use. AND it’s Google friendly. It’s just a cost of doing business to have a site. DO IT.

And a final note: if you are a restaurant or bar, go claim your Yelp profile and any others that are out there: Foursquare, Urban Spoon, etc. By claiming the profile, you take control of what is posted and you can get really solid feedback from customers. It is a tool that is very underutilized by the service industry. USE IT, IT IS FREE!

I could make money consulting with restaurants about this, I’m sure. But instead, I’ve put it here for all to use! I hope this helps out just ONE entrepreneur. That would make me VERY happy. Go forth and CROSS POST! :D

Haikus

Originally published at Misangela.com. Please leave any comments there.

Cow cat sits staring
Jedi mind tricks for dinner
Feed me now you will

Grey and foggy rain
Drizzle so light and soggy
Makes me a housecat

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Things You Probably Don’t Know About Me

Originally published at Misangela.com. Please leave any comments there.

There might be some Peeves in here – I do have a herd of them after all – but I’ll try to keep the list to my oddities rather than Peeves. I bitch about my peeves PLENTY! LOL Ok, here goes, no particular order:

– I was reading at almost high school levels when I was six.
– New Math (of the early 70s variety) messed with my ability to learn math, although I am quite good at the basics and can figure percentage in my head.
– As a kid, I had trouble learning to tie my shoes and ride a bike. I’m still quite clumsy.
– For you youngsters: back in the olden days (1970s) we ALL got chicken pox and mumps and we all had our tonsils out. It was just normal procedure. Now there are vax for the pox/mumps and no one gets their tonsils out. Which skeeves me out, man. Tonsils and adenoids are the most disgusting things EVAR. Look it up. I don’t want those in ME. EWWWW!
– I had a show horse in my early teens. The trainers my parents chose wouldn’t let me ride it. Then they stole it. REALLY.
– I’ve had a checking account since I was 14.
– I had 3 horses (not the show one) and a goat in my teens. We also had tons of cats but only one dog.
– Speaking of dogs, my parents had a female German Shepherd before we kids came along. That dog was old when we were small and it bit me once. It was a minor bite, but my parents did not console me and I had nightmares about dog attacks for years. I don’t dislike dogs, but you’ll never see me have one or be very friendly with one. I don’t trust them AT ALL.
– I have a very good memory in general. However, it’s fading as I age. I’ve never remembered names well, tho. But you can bet that I’ll remember if you are nice or mean to me.
– I am a human GPS. I regularly drive across the country without maps or GPS. I rarely have to use a map even in new places. Once I take a look at the road layout online or in an atlas, I’m good. I’ve given directions to people in towns I don’t even live in. Once I’ve been somewhere, I will remember it. I can give you directions for anything in Tucson, AZ, for instance.
– I can find four-, five-, six- leaf clovers easily.
– I am an avid birdwatcher. I can identify numerous birds by sight and/or song.
– I am not a germaphobe, but the thought of putting on someone else’s worn clothing without washing first makes me absolutely FREAK OUT. I am also freaky about towels; particularly hand towels. I won’t use one in someone else’s house.
– Speaking of someone else’s house, I strongly dislike sleeping over. I’m always a greasy headed mess in the mornings and I guess I’m just too vain. ? It doesn’t feel like vanity as much as the fact that I HATE showering, etc. at someone else’s house. I’m fine at a hotel.
– I don’t mind at all having people stay at MY house. We used to have wild parties with sleepovers quite often. Now that we’re older and the partying is minimal, we don’t have guests as often, but I don’t mind it.
– Although I have tattoos, I will pass out at any sort of needle. It’s worse for medical needles than a tattoo machine, but the end result is the same. The sound of a tatt machine excites me and I don’t find it horribly painful, but I’ll feel woozy and have to have a break to fight the fainting. Once I’ve done that, I’m fine.
– I am terrified of the dentist. Thank the gods I have good teeth. My parents took us to an Army dentist when we were kids and he would drill our teeth w/out novocaine. CHILDREN. My brother also has dental anxiety. Thanks Mom & Dad. >:(
– I cannot STAND an open toilet. Can. Not. Stand. It. To me, there is nothing more offensive. Close that fucker up and put a fuzzy cover on it for chrissakes! What is wrong with people?
– I have trouble driving automatic vehicles. I’ve always (and WILL ALWAYS) had manuals and my feet get confused when there’s nothing to do. I also forget to put it in P when I park. I always want to use the parking brake, too, since that’s proper procedure for all manual vehicles. Put it in First and pull the brake. Bam.

That’s all for now. I’m a weird girl. Here’s your proof! LOL

2014 Wrap Up

Originally published at Misangela.com. Please leave any comments there.

As we near the end of another trek around the sun, I always feel the need to make a post of highlights (or lowlights) of the year. A semi-list in no particular order:

– We started 2014 at a party at someone’s house in Dacula. It became a Hillbilly Hoedown, complete with screaming, fist fights and drunk driving. NOT an auspicious beginning for sure. Out of that came our current rule of NEVER staying at anyone’s house overnight unless absolutely necessary. Why risk it?

– We lost DJ in April. He was old and sickly. He waited for me to get back from my trip and he died two days later. He had a seizure right in front of us on a Saturday. It sucked.

– We finally walked away from the Maplehurst house in June. It was hard to let it go, but we had to. Despite Wells Fargo’s insistence that it was not discharged three years ago in the bankruptcy, it WAS and we were NOT obligated to pay for it. It will be auctioned next month and become rental once again. Nick left notes in the closets to whomever lives in it next.

– On the heels of the move, I get the call that my brother’s best friend died suddenly. He was doing some electrical work at an office and was electrocuted. It was horrible. It rocked me to my roots, I can tell you. The thought that one day a husband says goodbye to his wife and goes to work, never to return. It could happen to ME. It was very upsetting. On top of that, now my brother has no one. He’s all alone with elderly, sick parents and a woman-child with a new baby. I feel SO BAD for him and for Aron’s widow. Ugh. I cry just thinking about it.

– The move to the ‘burbs was relatively painless thanks to a great moving company that sent us TWO crews for the price of one. (Big League Movers if you need a referral.) We are now in a lovely ranch w/ full basement that is crammed full of our stuff. We have a lot of stuff. Other people’s stuff is shit, but our shit is stuff. (George Carlin. Kids, ask your parents.) Anyhow, I’m not a fan of the ‘burbs – too many white people and nothing to do. And white people are NOISY fuckers! Every single day I hear leaf blowers/yard equipment. EVERY. DAY. One day, the asshole neighbors behind us had TWO going from 8am-noon. Continuously. WTF, white people? OTOH, no gunfire, even on holidays and Nick is 10 minutes from work. Tradeoffs.

– We are in full swing of getting the pub concept off the ground. We’ve got about $55k available of our own money. No banks. The trick is finding space that has most of the equipment and a landlord who will work with us. So far, the owners of the place we want refuse to talk to us because we don’t have $100k. They seem to think that is a magical number that ensures success. We’ll see if they still feel that way after paying the fucking $500k note on that property for a few months. NO ONE is looking at it other than us, according to our broker. I’ve been working tirelessly on this. I want to put our names out there and meet as many people as I can. I feel that if we put enough energy out there, something will happen.

– Although I get ridiculed by my friends, I’m sticking to my No New Pets rule. Once Missy goes, I’m not getting any more cats. I’ve got a damn good reason: if we get this pub going, I’ll never be home. Why have pets if you’re not home to enjoy them? If the pub doesn’t happen, we may move. We’ve been talking about it and we’d rather take our money and move with it than sit here and piss it away on rent. It could be a BIG move. Like to Europe big. We don’t want to be in the US when we grow old. Healthcare here sucks. We’re getting passports, but that’s as far as that plan goes right now. We are keeping our options open. When Nick’s job ends, we have to make decisions. Until then, we save money and try to open a pub.

2014 has lived up to its 7 number. 7 is my life path number and I’ve certainly been working on THAT this year. 2015 is an 8 year. 8 is a karmic number; a bringer of change. That seems to be tracking with what we’ve got going on. I look forward to the challenges of an 8 year. I’m curious about what I’ll say on Dec 31 next year. I’ll be 50 this time next year. What a concept. Eh, I’ve always been a late bloomer. Some things never change. :)

Happy New Year, y’all.

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